There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
Randomize
