No, you can still breathe under the balls.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
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