If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
