does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize
