a queef is a wish your heart makes.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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