Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
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