It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
Of course I have a pirate flag
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
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