Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize