He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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