then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
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