But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
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