Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
I enjoy the company of your penis
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize