OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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