Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Randomize
