Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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