I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
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