what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
