Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize