Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I'm at a crab and wine festival with my dad. He just introduced me as his girlfriend to all of his co-workers. I am so drunk I thought he was serious.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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