i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I just woke up to a lawnchair covered in lipstick. I'm wearing red lipstick. What happened and is the tequila?
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize
