Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Randomize
