It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
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