You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
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