the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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