idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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