yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize