i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
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