oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
