You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Randomize
