Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize
