a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
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