I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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