Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
