Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Randomize
