I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
only you would photoshop your dick
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
Randomize
