I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Also, beer. Big fan.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
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