i just had sex bonerless
Small penises have feelings too.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Randomize
