I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
Plan B is the new Plan A
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
