I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize