could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
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