I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
You dont lie about slip and slides
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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