He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
