Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
Randomize
