He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
