I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
