Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Randomize
