Moan for me like Helen Keller
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Sext me about skeletons
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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