I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
love makes seman taste better
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
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