check it out our google latitudes are spooning
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
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