I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Randomize
