How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Randomize
