R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
